You hit the nail on the head when you said that you didn’t want to root your entire personality to a group.
For me, it is both an outward and an inward resistance to dilute my whole being to a label that doesn’t define me. For eg: I love running but I am not a ‘runner’. I love reading but I am not a ‘reader’. I love my work but I am not a ‘workaholic’
The people whom I deeply connect with are those who know me a layer deeper than the above labels. Being in cliques seems to make it impossible to go beyond these labels. I may be wrong on the latter.
I have a similar inclination and I've come to the realization that I don't want to be a part of a group that (desperately) wants me. But I wouldn't mind being part of a group where the members are people I look up to. So a group where I'm the net beneficiary (in terms of learning) I'm keen to join; otherwise, I'm anywhere between not interested and lukewarm. What are the limits of your tendency?
I don't actively think about it honestly. It's not a decision I make consciously. I just sort of..start pulling away if I feel like I need to learn a certain language of the group (not literally but tonal or even topical).
I think if the group has a purpose to exist towards a goal or is for coordinating some activity I am perfectly fine with it. E.g. working on a project.
…not too dissimilar and will note whenever i determine i am one way and that the other way has value there is at least as much value in figuring out if that other value has enough value for me to consider being broader…that said i have no argument for adding more black to the black…as for substack this place is about as boring as a nursing home and the food is worse…the audience here is so self thirsty…hard to not feel on the outside looking in (pours myself a soda of myself…slurps)…
I feel you! (Pity for the photo XD) It took me aaages to let a group of friends 'adopt' me and even now I'm proudly the odd one. I am very loyal, but also 'ew leave me alone it's embarrassing'. I accidentally joined a book club and I have no intention of reading any of the agreed-upon books. Is it the Scorpio in me? Maybe. Does this innocent form of anarchy keep me young? Also maybe.
Ha ha...I wouldn't even touch book clubs with a ten foot pole. 😅. In fact, the more popular a book is and is being recommended by everyone the more I develop an uncalled for aversion to it.
It's pathological. Can't believe I am making people read my therapy sessions. 😂
Is it a way of revealing an inherent bias for rebellion?? Or is being a contrarian a cool thing? Conformity is definitely boring. But natural laws are built on it too. Just pondering..
Maybe? The thing is I am not inherently contrarion across the board or a rebel. I see the value of what's accepted, popular, common wisdom etc. so this may be its own thing and perhaps tied to my belief that individual freedom is the most valuable social attribute.
You hit the nail on the head when you said that you didn’t want to root your entire personality to a group.
For me, it is both an outward and an inward resistance to dilute my whole being to a label that doesn’t define me. For eg: I love running but I am not a ‘runner’. I love reading but I am not a ‘reader’. I love my work but I am not a ‘workaholic’
The people whom I deeply connect with are those who know me a layer deeper than the above labels. Being in cliques seems to make it impossible to go beyond these labels. I may be wrong on the latter.
I have a similar inclination and I've come to the realization that I don't want to be a part of a group that (desperately) wants me. But I wouldn't mind being part of a group where the members are people I look up to. So a group where I'm the net beneficiary (in terms of learning) I'm keen to join; otherwise, I'm anywhere between not interested and lukewarm. What are the limits of your tendency?
I don't actively think about it honestly. It's not a decision I make consciously. I just sort of..start pulling away if I feel like I need to learn a certain language of the group (not literally but tonal or even topical).
I think if the group has a purpose to exist towards a goal or is for coordinating some activity I am perfectly fine with it. E.g. working on a project.
…not too dissimilar and will note whenever i determine i am one way and that the other way has value there is at least as much value in figuring out if that other value has enough value for me to consider being broader…that said i have no argument for adding more black to the black…as for substack this place is about as boring as a nursing home and the food is worse…the audience here is so self thirsty…hard to not feel on the outside looking in (pours myself a soda of myself…slurps)…
I am confused and thirsty now........but i got the 'not too dissimilar' part.
I feel you! (Pity for the photo XD) It took me aaages to let a group of friends 'adopt' me and even now I'm proudly the odd one. I am very loyal, but also 'ew leave me alone it's embarrassing'. I accidentally joined a book club and I have no intention of reading any of the agreed-upon books. Is it the Scorpio in me? Maybe. Does this innocent form of anarchy keep me young? Also maybe.
Ha ha...I wouldn't even touch book clubs with a ten foot pole. 😅. In fact, the more popular a book is and is being recommended by everyone the more I develop an uncalled for aversion to it.
It's pathological. Can't believe I am making people read my therapy sessions. 😂
Is it a way of revealing an inherent bias for rebellion?? Or is being a contrarian a cool thing? Conformity is definitely boring. But natural laws are built on it too. Just pondering..
Maybe? The thing is I am not inherently contrarion across the board or a rebel. I see the value of what's accepted, popular, common wisdom etc. so this may be its own thing and perhaps tied to my belief that individual freedom is the most valuable social attribute.